[ dread gathered in the pit of his stomach as he waited for hyunki to answer but he quickly realized he had nothing to worry about. he had never actually believed in the concept of a 'other half' even if plenty he judged held onto the idea but now things were shifted in his mind.
hyunki seemed to complete him perfectly, making him whole. ]
I've liked every single second too, love, I don't want to back off or slow down or not spend as much time as possible with you. I - really care about you.
[ One of Hyunki's hands moved to Adder's hair again, just cupping the back of his head, feeling the silky soft strands as they talked, bathed in moonlight.
The most intimate moment Hyunki had ever shared with anyone. ]
And I really care about you, too. I did not think this would happen, when you first appeared. I thought you'd recoil from my touch, after I healed you. You looked so worried, and confused. I thought you'd leave, and I'd never see you again.
[ the most intimate and tender moment of adder's life as well. it brought peace to work its way over his body, practically boneless and at ease against hyunki's body. he never wanted to move and just wanted to exist in their little bubble for awhile. ]
Now, you can't get rid of me. [ he murmured, nuzzling against hyunki's neck. ] Your touch - felt so good, Hyunki. I wanted you to keep touching me but it seemed - I couldn't have asked then.
[ His tone said it all. He was so comfortable with Adder that his sarcasm came back to the surface, but full of fondness, very amused. ]
It feels a little crazy, doesn't it? I also wanted more, but you were so hurt, and so disoriented. I did not want to take advantage, especially since I could tell you do not let many people see you like this.
I know whatever will you do. [ adder offered back, lifting up to be able to look into hyunki's face. the surreal feeling might never leave him at this rate. ]
[ he gave a nod of his head. ] That's another reason I trusted you so easily and have continued to trust you. You - could have easily taken advantage of me in a variety of ways and didn't. [ if anything hyunki tried to help him as much as possible. ]
You - really took care of me. Without kind of judgement and not expecting anything.
[ Hyunki let out a sigh, like he had no idea what he was going to do with his current predicament, but the smile on his face belied the feeling. He had to chuckle, unable to keep it in.
Still, he sobered up quickly, his fingers running down along the nape of Adder's neck. ]
I did expect things. I expected your name, and I expected answers to my questions, which you provided. It was not selfless.
[ He turned his head to look at Adder, serious. ] It was not selfless, Adder. I have been so fascinated by you, from the moment we met. I wanted more, from the beginning.
[ looking at hyunki, he pulled back to see his face better. the words were a kind of blur in his mind because of the tranquility still wrapped around him but he tried to focus on it.
hyunki believed wanting answers made him not selfless? adder shook his head, leaning in to kiss him softly. ]
You wanted what anyone would want but he didn't demand anything of me. You didn't want me for something specific and then move on.
[ he laid back down with a slight pout on his lips. ] I wanted you from the beginning too, you know.
Yes, I usually serve a purpose if I'm focused on at all. [ he gave a faint shrug as if it didn't matter to him but clearly it did. so much mattered to him with how deeply his emotions ran. passionate barely began to describe him. ]
It's not selfish if I want you just as much, just as intently. You - want me without any stipulations. You're not trying to change me. That - [ he shook his head, holding tighter onto hyunki again. ]
[ The frown did not leave Hyunki's face. It was - they were similar in this way. Serving a purpose, only needed for the one thing. Hyunki knew the feeling, and yet he could not imagine anyone only wanting Adder for his power.
Not when he had so much to give. ]
Changing you would be silly, when I like who you are as much as I do.
[ a soft smile filled his face and he couldn't resist cupping hyunki's cheek for a moment. the sweetness just really shook him up from the inside out sometimes.
okay, almost all the time. ]
You give me a lot more confidence in myself, Hyunki. I hope I do the same thing for you. You're more than they led you to believe you are. You're stunning and remarkable.
[ and also his but it seemed too soon to say such a thing aloud. ]
[ Hyunki looked down, before leaning into the touch, nuzzling into it a little. ]
You do make me believe that this - what you see in me - might be true. I've never thought much of a myself before, but. I like the idea of being a lot to you.
I'll spend the rest of time trying to make you believe it. [ adder confessed, the words not sinking in, at least, the implication of them for a second or two. when it did, he tensed a little because they never really discussed it. What if it became too much too soon? Just because they were developing feelings for one another didn't mean hyunki wanted all of existence with only him.
rubbing at this cheek, he quickly added - ] I mean - for as long as you want to be with me - and -
[ Hyunki's heart rate picked up, and he suppressed a shiver, looking down and shuffling to press his forehead to Adder's. ]
The trees always say to live every day as if it's your last, because it could be. We may not know how we'll feel in 10, 50, 100, 500 years from now. But what I do know now is that I don't want to spend any potential last day without you. You've changed everything.
[ time moved very differently for someone like adder but he nodded his head. knowing his own emotions very rarely changed once he set them. another feature he knew not everyone shared in. most likely, a deity thing. ]
You're right. We can focus on now and not the future of what may or may not be.
We can, baby, we can try. [ it worried him a little about being too much for hyunki but he would really work on not being too intense or consuming. a difficult feat given he needed to be in the underworld context. ] I've always been the - plan everything to the last detail kind.
[Baby. The word sent a shiver, feeling absolutely delicious, down Hyunki's spine. ]
There's also nothing wrong with that. But I don't want you to think you have no freedom. I want you to be so - so free. To do whatever it pleases you. Because that matters, too. You can deviate from plans.
[ adder didn't even notice the baby, it just kind of happened naturally. as for the other bits, well, he considered them a lot closer.
freedom. what a foreign concept he knew so little about. usually, there were practical shackles around his ankles keeping him very tied to his duties. ]
You want the same thing? Freedom? Choosing what you want to do? What would be your top three things right now.
[ With a nod, Hyunki considered the question, not wanting to answer too lightly. There were a lot of things he wanted, and that he wanted to choose for himself.
He looked back with a very serious expression, thumb brushing Adder's cheek again. ]
Love. I want to get to choose who I'm with, and the rest be damned. That's the first, and most important thing. I also want to be able to travel, and see the world and learn from it, not be stuck in one place for my whole life, waiting for things to happen to me instead of making them happen myself. And third, I guess, I want to... be relevant, in a way. Matter to the world, do something with my life, and my powers.
[ It mainly had to do with not being stuck living like a tree waiting to be told what to do by his family. Who to marry, where to move, how to act.
[ the answer really spoke a lot about hyunki and adder considered again how special he happened to be. how rare and beautiful. he used to not believe in luck either but he couldn't think of anything else other than that when it came to hyunki. just how lucky he had turned out to be to meet him. ]
All three of those things can happen, Hyunki. You can pick who you want to be with, you're already making a difference and being relevant in that house. The traveling - might be a little more difficult but not impossible. You can have it - you can.
[ It wasn't that Hyunki didn't believe him, or didn't want to believe him. He did, so much. But he'd never heard anyone be as confident about this as Adder was, right now. It felt impossible, and his voice was very small when he spoke. ]
Edited (nevermind i confused my threads all is well) Date: 2018-09-24 06:47 pm (UTC)
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2018-09-20 11:29 pm (UTC)hyunki seemed to complete him perfectly, making him whole. ]
I've liked every single second too, love, I don't want to back off or slow down or not spend as much time as possible with you. I - really care about you.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-20 11:52 pm (UTC)The most intimate moment Hyunki had ever shared with anyone. ]
And I really care about you, too. I did not think this would happen, when you first appeared. I thought you'd recoil from my touch, after I healed you. You looked so worried, and confused. I thought you'd leave, and I'd never see you again.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-21 12:32 am (UTC)Now, you can't get rid of me. [ he murmured, nuzzling against hyunki's neck. ] Your touch - felt so good, Hyunki. I wanted you to keep touching me but it seemed - I couldn't have asked then.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-21 12:59 am (UTC)[ His tone said it all. He was so comfortable with Adder that his sarcasm came back to the surface, but full of fondness, very amused. ]
It feels a little crazy, doesn't it? I also wanted more, but you were so hurt, and so disoriented. I did not want to take advantage, especially since I could tell you do not let many people see you like this.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-21 05:12 am (UTC)[ he gave a nod of his head. ] That's another reason I trusted you so easily and have continued to trust you. You - could have easily taken advantage of me in a variety of ways and didn't. [ if anything hyunki tried to help him as much as possible. ]
You - really took care of me. Without kind of judgement and not expecting anything.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-21 09:10 am (UTC)Still, he sobered up quickly, his fingers running down along the nape of Adder's neck. ]
I did expect things. I expected your name, and I expected answers to my questions, which you provided. It was not selfless.
[ He turned his head to look at Adder, serious. ] It was not selfless, Adder. I have been so fascinated by you, from the moment we met. I wanted more, from the beginning.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-21 07:31 pm (UTC)hyunki believed wanting answers made him not selfless? adder shook his head, leaning in to kiss him softly. ]
You wanted what anyone would want but he didn't demand anything of me. You didn't want me for something specific and then move on.
[ he laid back down with a slight pout on his lips. ] I wanted you from the beginning too, you know.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-21 08:17 pm (UTC)Is that something people usually do? Use you for their own gains?
[ That definitely made him frown. ]
I'm still not selfless. The fact that I want you the way I do is pretty selfish, but I also don't think it's bad.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-22 12:23 am (UTC)It's not selfish if I want you just as much, just as intently. You - want me without any stipulations. You're not trying to change me. That - [ he shook his head, holding tighter onto hyunki again. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-09-22 12:35 am (UTC)Not when he had so much to give. ]
Changing you would be silly, when I like who you are as much as I do.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-22 01:27 am (UTC)okay, almost all the time. ]
You give me a lot more confidence in myself, Hyunki. I hope I do the same thing for you. You're more than they led you to believe you are. You're stunning and remarkable.
[ and also his but it seemed too soon to say such a thing aloud. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-09-22 11:53 am (UTC)You do make me believe that this - what you see in me - might be true. I've never thought much of a myself before, but. I like the idea of being a lot to you.
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Date: 2018-09-22 05:20 pm (UTC)rubbing at this cheek, he quickly added - ] I mean - for as long as you want to be with me - and -
no subject
Date: 2018-09-22 05:49 pm (UTC)The trees always say to live every day as if it's your last, because it could be. We may not know how we'll feel in 10, 50, 100, 500 years from now. But what I do know now is that I don't want to spend any potential last day without you. You've changed everything.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-22 07:13 pm (UTC)You're right. We can focus on now and not the future of what may or may not be.
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Date: 2018-09-22 08:14 pm (UTC)Thank you.
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Date: 2018-09-23 02:01 am (UTC)You're welcome. I'll try to not plan so much. Give more - room for things.
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Date: 2018-09-23 02:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-09-24 12:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-09-24 12:58 am (UTC)There's also nothing wrong with that. But I don't want you to think you have no freedom. I want you to be so - so free. To do whatever it pleases you. Because that matters, too. You can deviate from plans.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-24 01:03 am (UTC)freedom. what a foreign concept he knew so little about. usually, there were practical shackles around his ankles keeping him very tied to his duties. ]
You want the same thing? Freedom? Choosing what you want to do? What would be your top three things right now.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-24 09:12 am (UTC)He looked back with a very serious expression, thumb brushing Adder's cheek again. ]
Love. I want to get to choose who I'm with, and the rest be damned. That's the first, and most important thing. I also want to be able to travel, and see the world and learn from it, not be stuck in one place for my whole life, waiting for things to happen to me instead of making them happen myself. And third, I guess, I want to... be relevant, in a way. Matter to the world, do something with my life, and my powers.
[ It mainly had to do with not being stuck living like a tree waiting to be told what to do by his family. Who to marry, where to move, how to act.
Not anymore. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-09-24 06:33 pm (UTC)All three of those things can happen, Hyunki. You can pick who you want to be with, you're already making a difference and being relevant in that house. The traveling - might be a little more difficult but not impossible. You can have it - you can.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-24 06:46 pm (UTC)[ It wasn't that Hyunki didn't believe him, or didn't want to believe him. He did, so much. But he'd never heard anyone be as confident about this as Adder was, right now. It felt impossible, and his voice was very small when he spoke. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-09-24 11:26 pm (UTC)[ reaching out, he pressed his palm against hyunki's chest over his heart. ]
Your heart is special, beautiful and it is going to carry you through. Anything you decide, this won't lead you wrong.
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